


be safe, Alexander

by imbadwholf



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Insecure Magnus Bane, M/M, Misunderstanding, Misunderstandings, Multi, angsty, miss commuincation, tw: alec doesn't eat properly and does too much exerice in a frm of self harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-11-28 13:52:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11419341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imbadwholf/pseuds/imbadwholf
Summary: make nikki cry 101 got re-named.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [impossiblenikki](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=impossiblenikki).



 

Magnus looked out the window pane of his apartment onto the road below. It was rush hour and the streets were packed with Brooklyn commuters in a rush. _Are those scattering human's head towards a house, a home, loved ones?_ He wondered. Not like his life where his speed only increased to run away from danger. Singularly he wasn’t sad because of the fact his life was constantly shadowed in doubt and threats, no he had come to terms with that many centuries ago, or at least he had tried his best to. Instead, he was sad because at least at the end of those mundane days most people had something to return to. It might be friends, family or romantic partners. But almost all the people below him hadn’t lost almost all their companions, been orphaned and soon to be single. Twisting his wedding band between his fingers subconsciously the warlock let out a hollow laugh when he picked up on his actions.  “Mags?”

The rings had been his idea, and right now Magnus wished he hadn’t suggested them. Removing his own silver band he let the metal fall into his suit’s pocket with a loud resounding thud. “Through here.” His voice had not sounded that horse in so many years the warlock blinked due to a lack of recognition. “I’m by the window”

Once he had stowed away his boots Alec walked towards his husband. “Hello, sweetie. How was your day?” Leaning forward the younger one expected to kiss his partner but found himself to be the only one moving. After an awkward chuckle, he tucked his hands in his back pockets. “Are you okay? Did something happen today?”

_No, but it’s about to._ “No.”

Really starting to worry at the vacant looks above him the shadowhunter leaned back on his heels. “Okay. But Mags, babe,” reaching for his friend's smooth hands he caused the other man to instead turn his head. “Magnus, What is going on?”

“I just… I think it’s time.”

Widening his eyes Alec asked for clarification. “Time? Time for what?”

_Don’t put emotion into these words. Just say them._ “For this to be over.”

“Over?!”

“It’s been a good time. Alec. The best.” _No, don’t say that. You need to make sure he never comes back._ “Well maybe not the best but we had fun. Right?”

Now Alexander seemed to be dazed. “Yeah. It was… yeah, we had fun.” Vision blurred by his own tears he missed Magnus’. “Bu-”

_Say it. Say what you know will be the final blow. Say it so he won’t fight, because he would want you to be happy. Because he is perfect. Because he deserves better than you._ “No. Don’t try and change my mind, it’s already made up.”

The pleading had only just begun. “Please. Magnus. Please.”

_Say it._ “I can’t do this anymore Alexander. I can’t sit here and watch you die. I need you gone. I need to be able to move on. I need this.”

Gulping back his pain it seemed that the younger one was finally starting to realize there was nothing he could do. That this was it. This was the end. “I… I..Yes, oh. I mean, yeah of course.” Heading towards the door he picked up the coat he had laid on the back of the sofa what seemed like years ago. 

“I’ll send your stuff over tomorrow.”

“Don’t worry I can come back-” _He won’t want to see you._ “Yes. That is… that is fine.”

Biting the inside of his mouth it took everything in Magnus not to take it back. “Let me make you a portal.”

“No! Um, I mean no thank you.” Alec already had his shoes on at this point and the door half open. Not looking back he carried on. “I need to… I think I’m gonna walk for a bit.”

When they were a whole room apart Magnus let out a deep breath. “Be safe Alexander.” He said the same way he always did when Alec left


	2. Chapter 2

 “I can see why you wanted to have a ring around Magnus’ finger.”

_It wasn’t my idea._ “Oh?” Alec carried on punching the bag in front of him. 

Twiddling her hair Izzy nodded. “Yes. I mean imagine, Clary walking around everyday with a piece of jewelry on, one that means we are going to be together forever.” 

_Yeah forever_. “Yeah sounds good. Go talk to her about it.”

Startled Isabel stuttered. “Go talk to… go talk to her? Brother dearest what’s got your feathers in a twis-”

“Just leave it Izz.”

In a jovel tone the younger sibling continued. “Come on Alec you know I was just messing. You can tell me anyth- What is that?”

Without pausing his pursuit in damaging the punching bag he asked. “What is what?”

“Your hand. Alec. Alec hey hey wait stop.” When it was evident her brother would do no such thing Isabell slithered between him and machine, knowing no matter what he would never raised a hand to her. Instantly his hands stopped pumping. “Alec. They are red raw. Your skin. Your skin is cracked. You're going to be bleeding soon.” For a while they stood their a girl holding her brothers’ hands. “What is going on?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” There were tears in the coner of his eyes. “Please don’t make me.”

“Why?”

“Because then I’ll have to admit he was right.”

“Who was right?”

Just then Clary came through the doors and moved towards them, and just like the moment was gone. “Hey. Jace is complaining about some pain through your bond. Wanted me to check up and see if everything is alri-”

Sniffling a little the eldest in the room stormed out. “I have to go.” He shouted over his shoulder.

 

* * *

 

 

“You can’t hide from me forever. And hey kid if you gonna cause me this much pain I have a right to know what is going on.” Simon slapped Jace and whispered something about not being a prick. “Sorry… I didn’t mean that. You just, you know me I’m no good at all these emotional things. Just tell me what I can do t-” The door in front of him swung open and Simon ran away from the scene. 

Red shot eyes were staring at Jace. “Come in.”

“Okay. Cool. Yeah. I can do that.” For a while the two of them sat at the edge of the bed in Alec’s room and said nothing. “Look if you aren’t ready to talk about whatever it is. That’s… that’s fine. I just, I want you to know I am here for you.”

Nodding Alec asked in a weak and broken voice. “Could you… could you stay the night?”

“Of course dude, anything you need.” They got under the covers and Alec curled himself against his brother. Neither of them were dressed for bed but that wasn’t what made Jace uncomfortable. It was the idea that his pillar of strength was shaking against him in a battle to keep going. “You got this.” The words felt empty, because even though he had full faith in his friend he also had no idea what this was. “You always do Alec. It will be ok.”

 

* * *

 

The next morning Jace felt a dullness to the pain he had felt through his parabatai bond that had not been present before. It was not like the pain before had disappeared but instead of it being an open wound with the feeling of constant blood gushing from it, instead now a gauze had formed over the cut; the agony was ever present but it felt like Alec was getting more used to the feeling, like he was residing himself to that sensation and way of life. Making his way into the hall Jace headed to his own room. “Should I be jealous?” A voice whispered in mirth behind him. 

“For Angel's’ sake Simon!” He cursed and shook his head. They both chuckled a little. “Yes did I forget to mention I’m leaving you?” A quick chaste kiss was shared. “Now if you don’t mind I need to brush my teeth and get ready for my new lover.”

Bowing a little in his own dramatic way the vampire grinned. “But of course.”

With a roll of his eyes Jace did just that, not at all bothered by the fact his boyfriend watched him the whole time. At the training room he watched as Alec was already lifting weights several kgs above what he was supposed to be doing. “Give me a minute?” Simon nodded and left the two boys alone. “Are we gonna talk about this?”

“What happened to whenever I was ready?”

Wincing Jace he remembered he was trying to be pushy. “I mean yeah of course, but I was just checking to see if you are ready.”

“Well I am not. And if that will be all I got another two hundred of these to do before I have breakfast.”

Giving his best disapproving glare Jace moved away. “The damage you are doing to your body Alec, I hope you don’t know what you are doing for once.”


	3. Chapter 3

Days past and soon a couple of weeks had gone and still Alec seemed to give no more word about what was going on. Although not being forthcoming in his problem his friends pieced together it was something to do with Magnus, using what they had in front of them; he would avoid talking about his husband, he checked his phone less and most damningly he seemed to have moved back into the institute. 

“Couples fight.” Simon reasoned. “They can work through this.”

Isabell seemed less convinced this was something that could be brushed over instead she remarked. “Yes but people only get over things if they actually discuss the problem.”

 

* * *

 

 

That night the Lightwoods were on a mission involving more demons then the three of them had faced alone in a long time. Due to his self harming tendencies Alec had left on the mission on a empty stomach. With only two of the creatures left to defeat he collapsed on the floor. As one of said creatures moved forward towards the defenceless man Izzy caught sight of it and with a single movement of her wrist her whip had caused the death of another demon. “Get him home. Phone Magnus. I’ll sort this one out.” There was a fire in her eye, partly the reflection of the recently exploded monster and partly from her fierce anger.  _No one hurts my family._

 

* * *

 

“What is it blondie? I’m busy.”

“It’s Alec.”

Missing the panick in the younger man’s voice the warlock sighed. “Yes I am sure you have heard, things aren’t as simpl-”

“He’s hurt Magnus. Bad.”

This time he notice the worry. “Where is he?”

“His room.”

“Leave him.”

“No! What? Why?”

“I want to see him alone.”

“I don’t know if I can do that.”

“I can help him Jace. Just… just make sure we are alone. “

“Ok. But just this time Bane.”

 

* * *

 

Filtering his fingers over the cut Magnus healed the last bit up. “Mag-”

“Keep your eyes closed.”

Without questioning Alec did so. Having only just awoken from his induced coma he was confused why his ex was leaning against him. “Why are you..” Then he feels it, that familiar tingle of magic around his serum. “Oh.”

There was no malice or true threat in his voice when he said. “You have to stop doing this Alec. I can’t come back every time you get hurt.”

“I’m sorry they called you. But I won’t apologise for my job.”

Letting out a deep breath the warlock did not know he had been holding Magnus argued. “No but you could change your actions.”

“What?”

Sarcasm laced his reply. “Oh I don’t know Alec? How about using a weapon you are actually used before when heading out on patrol?”

Shifting a little under the intense glare he knew he was getting the Lightwood bite back. “I know how to use a bow and arrow Magnus. Surely you haven’t forgot that.”

_I could never forget anything about you._ “You know how use a .5 model, even a .7 but don’t bullshit me and say in the last few weeks you have become comfortable enough to have the lighter weighing .3 and that bow… Alec it’s almost as if you wanted to be killed.”

_So what if I did?._ “I didn’t know you payed… still do pay so much attention to me-my weapons.”

_There are allot of things you don’t know Alec._ “Yes well. It was on the floor and I almost feel over it. You were always leaving things around our app- Anyway, I am finished  now. Please tell your siblings to contact another warlock next time. I can recommend some good ones.”

Before he had a chance to lift himself fully off the mattress Alec lifted his hand and managed to grab the others’ without opening his eyes. “Thank you. Thank you Magnus.”

Willing his voice not to crack Magnus said. “Just… just get better.” There was a sound of a portal being made and then imploding inside the small room. For a few moments Alec left his eyes shut and tried to ignore the wetness of his checks. “Yes he has gone Izzy. I’m just going to sleep it off though. See you tomorrow.” He called out before breaking down, coiling himself into a ball he tried to ward off the world with his long back. Unaware that elsewhere in brooklyn another man was doing exactly the same things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> every single kudos and comment means so much to me so thank you. also i know nothing about arrows so... sorry


	4. Chapter 4

“I have it about up to here,” Lifting his hand above his head Raphael continued. “With your mopping.”

Rolling his eyes Magnus internally cursed himself for automatically imitating his ex so perfectly. _It’s Raph’s fault he forced me to it._ “Well I’m sorry but I did just lose the love of my life.”

Exasperated the vampire moved his arm around. “But that’s the problem, you didn’t lose anything. And yet you gave up everything.”

Turning back towards the window Magnus surveyed the traffic below him, an unnerving feeling settling in his stomach as he remembered the last time he had looked in this downward direction. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Oh yes. Yes you do. And the worst bit… you won’t even tell him what this shit is all about.”

Not even flinching at the language or harsh tone being directed at him the older of the two took a long sip of his alcoholic beverage. “He can never know.”

Not attempting to hide his lack of agreement with the situation Raphael lifted himself from the armchair. “Yeah yeah, I know. I am sworn to secrecy, yada yada.”

Looking over his shoulder the warlock’s eyes alone showed the weight of his request. “Please. Rapheal for me.”

And that was the horrible part; if it was anyone else he would go behind their back no problem, but then again if it were anyone else he would not care enough about their love life. “You know I won’t.”

"Yes I do. I just... I have to ask."

"You can't avoid him forever Bane."

 _Forever. That was never the problem. Not before._ "I can do allot of things, I'll have you know." In his boisterous voice he used for strangers he made that statement but his companion wasn't swayed.

"Whatever you say."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short and sweet platonic support from raph!!! hope you have enjoyed this so far. all kudos and comments and bookmarks are making my days so much better thank you.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter includes one fluffy flashback. And some angst. And also a cut between two scenes. Allot. Like each get's two lines before we switch. Sorry but I needed to created the #drama.

Walking through the halls of the institute like he had a million times previously Alec noted he had never felt more lost in his life. He still had a sense of direction when it came to his professional career. But the plan he had in mind, his future, their future, the one outside the war and fighting, the future that really matter, that had been stripped from him. “Izzy I don’t want to talk about it.” He had said again before even looking up from her high heels. 

“Alec,” She pleaded and finally he raised his gaze to meet her eyes. Her wet eyes. “It’s Max. He got hurt.”

If there was a feeling for a world being torn apart and then ripped to shreds that was what the older sibling was undergoing just then. “What do you mean?” 

Grabbing his hand Isabell walked towards the little boy’s room. “He was out. Just ran off for a stroll. Must be more like Jace than we thought. He got attacked. They recognised him as a Lightwood. Those… those demons they went for him because of us.” When Alec went to open the door Izzy pulled him back. “I can’t.. I can’t go in there again. The image of him is… the blood. I’ll never get over it.”

Completely split about which person he should stay with. “I just.. Izzy,”

“He needs you. It’s fine.”

 

Once or twice in his old home Alec had seen a person repeated in photos scattered around. He remembered asking Magnus about it.

 

“Hey,” When there was no reply Alec popped his head into the kitchen. “Hey babe.” Magnus hmmed to say he was listening as he tossed another egg into the pan. “Who um.. Who’s this person?”

Due to the fact Magnus insisted on not wearing a t-shirt as he cooked (not that Alec would ask for him ever to) Alec’s eyes were drawn to the movement of muscles as his boyfriend took the offered photo. “Oh.”

Although Magnus had not seemed annoyed Alec quickly back peddled. “I mean you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I was just curious because she is in a lot of photos.” Then he winced. “That wasn’t supposed to sound so accustional.” 

Stopping his boyfriend with a kiss Magnus smiled down at his fried eggs. “That’s Catriona. One of my closest and oldest friends. Best warlock I know.”

Wrapping two arms around Magnus Alec placed a kiss on his partner's neck. “I’ll have to introduce you to a High Warlock I know.”

In a teasing town Magnus asked. “Oh?”

“Yep. His names Magnus Bane. Best Warlock in the world.”

“Is he now?”

“Oh yes and the best lover.”

The eggs were cold by the time they got back to them.

 

Because of this Alec knew the woman before him before they were introduced. Shaking away the bittersweet memory he asked about Max’s condition. It seemed she may be familiar with his face as well due to her not needing clarification before addressing him. “Alec he is doing well.” _Maybe it’s the Lightwood genes, maybe it’s because I’m the head of this institute, maybe it’s because of Magnus._

After less than half an hour she packed to go. “Thank you so much for bringing him here an-”

“I didn’t.”

“Pardon?”

Realising her slip she tightened her lips before continuing. “It was… another concerned citizen.”

_Someone who wishes to remain unknown. It must be a downworlder, not wanting their kind to think they favour Shadowhunters._ “If you can please give them my regards.”

“I’ll do my best.”

 

* * *

>  
> 
> “This is unacceptable!”
> 
> Without flinching Magnus greeted his friend with a drink. “It’s nice to see you as well Catriona.”

 

“Max I could have lost you. You silly boy. Izzy is right you are very much like our brother.” Moving around the blankets a bit Alec smiled. “She usually is right. Though don’t let her hear me say that.”

>  
> 
> “It’s a perfectly good drink Cat I’m not sure why you are turning it down. Frankly I’m offended.” Turning away from her Magnus set the glass down. Giving himself time to be away from her disapproving glare.
> 
> “Don’t you Cat me!”

 

“Talking of Izzy I should probably go get her. She was worried sick about you. We all were.” Alec didn’t know why he was talking to the unconscious boy but it felt comforting. 

 

> “What have I done now?”
> 
> “You know very well Bane.”
> 
> “Bane? Oh damn you must be very angry.”
> 
> “Ugh!”

 

Pulling the door to, Alec whispered. “He is good. Asleep but fine now. Thanks to Catriona.”

“I’m gonna go and sit with him.”

>  
> 
> “Look you are the best in the business Cat. They needed you. I needed you.”
> 
> “That little boy needed the actual best Magnus. And instead you lumped me in with this drama.”
> 
>  

Izzy removed her shoes from her feet so the heels wouldn’t tap against the floor and wake up her youngest brother. “Hey Max. She managed through what was left of her tears. “How you doing buddy?” One of his hands lay upon the blanket and she clasped in both of hers. “Had us really worried there for a sec. Jace will be here soon. I’m sure he’ll pat you on the back after he has shouted a bit. Say something like ‘do as I say not as I do.’. You know how he is.” There was a beat of silence, where it was just two siblings holding hands and healing. “I’m just so thankful that C-”

“Mmm.” Max mumbled in his sleep.

 

> “And you my dear, are the best.”
> 
> “I’m not a high warlock and it’s hardly like you were busy.”

“Max?”

“Mmmma.”

 

> “I do have a life outside of those Shadowhunters you know.”
> 
> Triumphantly she crossed her arms, like he had just played her game and lost and something in Magnus told him he had. “I never said that.”

 

Through his haze of left over pain, terror and the pure exhaustion he felt the smallest Lightwood managed to say one word. “Magnus.” He repeated the name several times. “It was Magnus.”

 

> “I just… just… well you seemed to be hinting at that.”
> 
> “I don’t think that Magus. Do you?”
> 
> “Oh I don’t know.” In defeat he slumped into his own chair.

 

“No Max it was just magic. I suppose that’s the only magic you have felt before. But it was Catriona.” Izzy couldn’t explain why she felt the need to explain the situation to him considering his state and the fact he was paying no attention to her and his eyes were still firmly closed but she carried on. “Magnus wasn’t here.”

“Was.”

 

> “You saved him Magnus. You found that boy while you were just doing a daily stroll. You protected him. You brought him home and despite all this you think you can keep them out of your lives.”
> 
> “I can try.”
> 
> “You can but do you want to?” That was greated with no reply. “Just. Don’t call me the next time you want to stay away from Alec.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cat wasn't at their wedding because she was busy saving someone. Just to clarify.  
> Also kudos and comments give me life.


	6. Chapter 6

The next day Jace was sitting in an arm chair opposite his little brother. “Like I said I get it, the want to explore. But the world out there… it isn’t for us.”

“You are like Ariel.” Simon wistfully said from the side.

Both of the siblings looked at him with a raised brow. “Excuse me?” Jace smiled.

Stuttering a bit the vampire tried to explain. “It’s… it’s a disney movie. You know princess, old horrible tales twisted into happy ever afters… nope? Okay.”

Fondly the blonde man shook his head before turning his attention back to Max. “All I am saying is I was there. I did it too. Snuck out and it did me no good.” Then looking at his boyfriend a little sheepishly he added. “Took me to actually be doing patrol work to meet the love of my life.” Without even looking he could feel the boy’s eyes roll. Coughing back a blush at all the emotion he continued. “All I am saying that running off. That never did any good.”

Again raising his eyes to the ceiling Max folded his arms. “Yes but that’s you. Not me. And there’s a big diffrence between us.”

That final sentence made the two men bristle a bit, although Simon hadn’t been there to witness it he had heard between tears the recalling of the time Max had said Jace didn’t belong with the Lightwood family, and both of them were thinking of that moment now. “Oh really?” Jace tired to play coy donning a small smirk.

Exasperation showed on Max’s face. “Yes because I have someone out there looking after me.”

“Who?”

“Magnus of course.” And with that Max pulled up his blanket.

Startled Simon asked. “Um… Max what do you mean?”

“Magnus will always protect us.” He said it as if it was a fact. “Because he loves Alec. And he loves us.”

None of them saw the receding figure from the door.

 

All he had heard was the final few sentences of the interaction but Alec felt his face flush. It spurred him on more to do what he had decided to do; visit Magnus.

 

* * *

 

 

A place that had once been home shouldn’t feel so foreign. The lights in the hall were still dimmed and tinged yellow, the walls they were attached to were still green but it somehow felt like Alec was swimming under water, like he was viewing his whole world from another angle and under water. It looked familiar to him but like a language he knew and words he didn’t, he could piece the bits together, knew the way to the flat but he wasn’t sure if the path knew him any longer. Once he had belonged on the other side of the wards Magnus had placed up but now he wasn’t sure they would let him in. When the woosh of magical acceptance let him in a weight lifted from his chest. Raising a fist he tapped the door. “Mags- I mean Magnus. I just wanted to say thank you.” There was a sound behind the barrier and he knew his ex had made it loud enough for him to know to carry on. Magnus didn’t want to see him but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t listen. That was better than nothing for the Shadowhunter. “For everything, really. For whatever you had to do with Max, because he seems admit it was you. For saving me.” Settling down on the ground by the door Alec blinked back some overflowing emotions. “And I don’t just mean with that demon attack. Or anything to do with these stupid wars.” Curling up his hand he made to hit something but then he retracted his tense hand and flexed his fingers; _I am not that person. Not anymore._

 

* * *

 

The next morning Alec awoke in a bed he knew not to be his. But als o not Magnus’...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this! Any ideas where Alec is?  
> I have one more little bit of angst planned then I think you might have gone through enough pain... we shall see.  
> Also I don't ever use "..." but it seems I am addicted now... HAHA.  
> Kudos and comments are much appreciated.


	7. Chapter 7

 

The purple covers dropped below Alec’s torso as he rose from the bed. It was then that he noticed he was wearing the same clothes as he remembered wearing to Magnus’ apartment. In fact that place was the last one he could recall from his memories. It was as if by standing outside that door had hypnotised him. After a small glance around the room the Shadowhunter felt that familiar sense one does when they vaguely remember being somewhere before. 

 

“I am telling you, you would enjoy it.” Magnus said in a voice they both know was trying to hide how much he cared about the outcome of this conversation. “That’s all I am saying, Alexander.”

Dropping himself in a huff on the bed the man in question moaned. “You know not to call me that. It’s my weakness.”

Pretending to be ignorant to the conversation the older of the two headed towards the wardrobe and collected the outfit he wanted to get: a long red dress that tugged to his features in all the ways they loved. “I am sure I have no idea what you are talking about Alexander.”

Letting out a sigh into a soft pillow Alec tried to keep his voice calm as he remembered the last time his fiance had worn that particular outfit. “Fine. Okay. Sure. Whatever.”

Joy bounced around Magnus’ naked eyes. “Really?” He smiled. “You know I was only teasing love. You can do whatever you want. I just want you to be happy.”

Once lifted from the bed Alec traced a finger over the stubble he loved so much. “And I you.”

 

Well that answered that then. Alec knew where he was: Magnus’ spare room. Well more accurately one of the few he had scattered around the loft. But this one was used simply for the purpose of the large mirror which took up half a wall and the large cabinet used to store Magnus’ most fancy outfits. _He knew he wouldn’t need to come in here. But also… he must have brought me to this room._

Walking past his reflection the raven haired boy tried to ignore the large circles below his puffy eyes and instead focused on tousling his hair a little. The way he knew used to drive Magnus crazy. _What’s the point? There's no hope_

Outside in the hall he smelt fresh coffee and quickly picked up the food and beverage that had been left for him. Along with a note:

Be safe Alexander.

_Maybe not everything is hopeless._ He was not naive enough to lift his hopes due to a simple scribble, especially one that lacked the usual kiss the got when left a message in such a form, but Alexander. It was there thing. Magnus would know that. The Warlock had to know what he was doing when he put that. 

At the barrier to the home Alec called back. “I will be. Thank you. If it is ok I will be back tomorrow night.”

* * *

 

 

Even death couldn’t remove the absolute mirth from Ragnor’s smile. “So you just… let me get this right. You sat by the same door as him, and when you heard his… what was it you used to call them? His adorable snoring. Yes that is it. You heard that, you opened your door and lifted him… not by magic but hand to your spare room. And it’s not the fact you still let him through your wards, gave him food or any of the actually observed things you are stressing over… it’s tha-”

“You don’t understand.” Interrupted Magnus.  “All those things… what you are talking about.” Still pacing around he tried to remain as unchanged as possible. “But that.. That was a slip of the tongue.”

Fiddling with a pen between his fingers Ragnor raised a single brow. “I think you mean hand.”

With a waft of his hand Magnus showed how little he cared about the argument. “Not at all the point. Alexander, that was our thing. He was my Alexander.”

Whispering Ragnor said. “He still could be.”

“And now… he is coming back. What do I do?”

Finally rising from his seat Ragnar advised. “You talk to him. You see him. You let him in.”

“If he sees me he will figure it out.. But even if he doesn’t if I see him I will surely tell him.”

“Precisely.” Clicking his fingers the horned of the two prepared to disappear. “I said let him in.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again hope you enjoyed!!!


	8. Chapter 8

 

Finding himself sitting on a stool next to his front door was something that if he was honest with himself Magnus knew he was going to end up doing that day. As soon as the nephilim had said he wished to return there was nothing more important for the Warlock to be doing that night. But whilst the hours rolled on past he found himself getting more and more anxious. /I know Alexander, there is nothing that could prevent him from coming to see me. No sooner had those words passed through his ancient brain did a fire message flutter towards him. 

 

> I am sorry. So sorry. My siblings are keeping me on lock down. Even Max is in on this. They are calling it mission Alec 3.0. When where the other 2? I don’t know. Knew that would make you smile.
> 
>  

Magnus checked himself and tried to regain control of his rising cheeks.

 

> Don’t worry about me, not that I am assuming you would.

 

_ But I do. _

 

> Ignore that. Basically I have a cold and I can’t come around. But if I am better tomorrow I have every intention of visiting. If that is okay with you.
> 
>  
> 
> Alexander.
> 
>  

* * *

  
  


To say he was suffering a slight headache would be to putting it lightly. “It’s all the late night patrols you insist on doing.” Izzy had scolded Alec the previous night. “No wonder you are so sick. All sorts of germs out there.” If he had had enough energy the older of the two would have rolled his eyes but at that point he was very close to collapsing. With more effort than it would normally require the Lightwood lifted himself from his sitting position in bed and turned his attention to his alarm clock… or at least where is alarm clock should be. The bedside table was instead bare bar a small bowl of steaming soup and a note. Less than a moment’s glance at it and he recognised that handwriting; it was afterall the one that had wrote their wedding invitations. Suddenly more energy surged through his veins and he found himself rushing to lift up the cardstock, on it in perfect penmenship was a simple statement, but even those words were more than enough to make his heart sore:

 

> Carrot, your favorite. Please take care of yourself. We should probably talk. I am so sorry. Be safe, Alexander.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tempted to change the name to be safe Alexander. How would we feel about that?  
> Hope you enjoyed! Almost there. So close.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> clizzy. and luke. and future malec?

“I feel like a mess. All I have wanted for months is to propose to her. Tell Clary about how much I love her and how I want to be with her forever. And don’t get me wrong I still want to. If anything seeing Alec being sad and how much diffrence between with the person you love can have on your life is pushing me forward even more to just ask her. But.. what if she says yes. It almost feels wrong to feel happy while he doesn’t.”

“You are starting to sound like your brothers too much. Don’t be self sacrificing.”

Rolling her eyes Izzy plonked herself down on the edge of her bed. “Noted. Simon there isn’t just that possibility that is running through my head.”

Slightly reposition himself the vampire looked in her eyes. “Go on.”

“What i-what if she says no?”

Unable to contain himself the younger of the two curled over as he laughed, gripping his stomach for the full affect. “Don’t… oh my goodness Izzy don’t do that to me.”

Instantly the Lightwood changed her stance from nervous to angry. “Stop laughing at me.” On her feet in an moment she attempted to stare him down. “She could easily say no. How am I supposed to know? I love her Simon. I’m in love with Clary. And sure she says the same back, and I believe her but how long can that truly last? She can make new runes, she is basically shadowhunter royalty and I’m a mess… she’d be joining to a ruined history of family problems and politics. Clary would never agree to marry me.”

“I think,” A voice said from behind Izzy. “I would.”

Flitting his eyes between the pair for a moment Lewis sensed this wasn’t something he should any longer be involved with. With a clap of his hands he rose and said. “Okay… well I’ll be just be going.” Neither of the girls payed him any attention.

“Clary you don’t have to sa-”

“I don’t have to what? Say that?” The ginger one asked once they were alone. “I don’t have to do anything. Dammit I don’t do anything unless I want to, like really want to. And when I think of what I want to do, no matter what it is, I know it would be vastly improved by being married to my own queen.”

After they had kissed Izzy pulled back. “So we are… wow we are engaged.”

“Oh no Lightwood, you don’t get away that easily. Now you know what my answer is. I still expect to be properly asked. But another day. I have plans for us tonight.”

Though a laugh Izzy managed. “Oh? Well lead the way.”

 

* * *

 

Sharing one last drink before he left Luke asked. “So I guess you won’t be going to the wedding then?”

“What wedding?”

“Clary and Izzy. I’m not sure when it is but if you insist on keeping this…” Wafting his hand in the air the werewolf struggled to find the appropriate word. “Thing, with Alec.”

Pondering this revelation Magnus said. “I didn’t know they were engaged.”

“Well I guess it is a pretty new development. Still I know it would mean allot to him if you went… and them of course. You know those girls adore you.”

In a failed sense of bravado the Warlock laughed. “Who doesn’t?”

Luke squinted his eyes. “How are the things between you and Alec? I know it’s not my place to get involved.” He raised his hands in defence. “But I just think… I know you are starting to crack. To be fair considering how much you love him I surprised it took this long. At the same time I can’t wait for this… this rubbish to be over.”

An image was ingrained in Magnus’ mind. It was of a proposal. And whilst the couple was a same sex one and involved a Lightwood it wasn’t Alec’s sister that was asking the big question. “When he is better we will talk. I’m aware my actions may have caused him some pain and even though now I think I would like to reconcile there is no guarantee that he wants the same.” The exasperated and disbelieving huff his friend released should not have been as relieving for the age old Warlock as it was. “Let me portal you home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I teased a Clizzy proposal earlier and I think it's only fair I give you one. Also tipsy!sassy!luke. And maybe Magnus is looking for redepetion in the next chapter from the love of his life....  
> please leave comments and kudos <3


	10. Chapter 10

Alec had heard his phone beep a few moments before but being so engrossed in what he was writing he had not paid it any attention. Finally, when he tore his eyes away from the paper the Shadowhunter looked down at his device still resting on his large table he found it physically impossible to explain how he felt. There was an almost even mixture of excitement and something akin to scared when he saw who it was. ‘My Love’. Despite not having seen Magnus in far too long and their current relationship status he doubted he would ever change his address book to call the love of his life anything else. The actual message itself was short just reflecting the older man’s congratulations on the new wedding to be had. Even though it referenced nothing to do with the pair there was some hope dangerously starting to blossom inside of Alec. Quickly, before he could change his mind, he typed back a quick thank you message. Before the phone could reach the desk Alec was about to rest it on it vibrated in his hand, he couldn’t even if he wanted to resist the smile consuming his face. Again a simple text flashed across his screen.

Shortly after spending more time pondering a reply Alec did just that. Although it wasn’t everything they had once been, this ability to talk to Magnus was everything to Alec. Little did he fully comprehend how much it also meant to the Warlock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry been on holiday. Kudos and comments make my day! Please tell me what you think. It's a short and sweet chapter cause they deserve a little fluff.

**Author's Note:**

> I own none of these characters ofc. And I wish them none of this pain. But if you enjoyed this part please leave a comment or kudos. There is more to come.


End file.
